How to do my democratic duty when the choice is so slim
Who do I vote for on Thursday? I am a typical floating voter. I vote for whoever will do me some good. Problem is I’m employed, married and don’t have any children so there is not much chance of any of the main parties doing anything but making me poorer. There is really not much choice in Mile Cross where I stay. It’s (in no particular order) Conservative, Labour, Lib. Dem. and Greens. The only ones that haven’t had any scandal round here are the Greens! I certainly won’t go for Labour. If they can’t keep their MPs in line then there is no hope of them keeping the councillors in line. (Ian Gibson has been deselected, shame… NOT!)
Now for the European elections. Now, the difficulty here is figuring out who will appear on the voting slip. I did a bit of a Google and found UK Polling Report. No idea if it is a legit site but it says that 69.2% of the Norwich North population are Christian. That’ll be the reason for the queues outside the churches every Sunday. The site wasn’t much help in my quest to find out who was standing. Next stop Norwich City Council. I’m definitely on the right track here. They provide a helpful PDF document with all the Eastern Region candidates on. There are 92 candidates on the list and some are from London! How do I know who is actually standing in my area? I’m good on the internet, I should be able to find out.
Right, turns out Eastern region gets 7 MEPs. I’ve found the current bunch’s mug shots. All very similar - male, over 55 and used to wearing a tie. I also found out that each of the 7 represents all constituents. So I can contact any one of them and if I don’t like his answer to my question I can go on and contact the other 6 until I get the answer I want. Cool!
More info, this time from the people who should know, the UK Office of the European Parlament. It is proportional representation for these elections. I knew that, honest. It makes me sound so dim not to have known that, or remembered that. Now, proportional representation means things get complicated. I don’t need to know my alphabet to make an X, I need to know my numbers because I have to rank them in order. With 92 candidates I could be there all day! Good explanation on this site, shame about the link that says it will take me to how the votes are counted - it doesn’t, it takes me to info about Northern Ireland.
Finally! I’ve got it. I have to vote for a party (or independent), not a candidate. Glad I checked. Now I can narrow down the 92 to just 15. Much more manageable. Those 15 are, in alphabetical order complete with my sarcastic comment:
- Animals Count - Yes they do, but can they raise my income?
- British National Party - Bunch of racist w*****s
- Christian Party “Proclaiming Christ’s Lordship” - Should be a dead cert. in Mile Cross if 60+% of the population are Christian
- Conservative Party - Bunch of corrupt w*****s. Did you see that guy on Have I Got News for You? Alan Duncan. After watching that I could never vote Tory. If you missed it there is a recap at the bottom of the list.
- English Democrats Party - Sound a bit anti European which is not much good in the European parliament. I get the feeling that they might get together with UKIP and just not turn up on the grounds that it is against their party policy.
- Jury Team - Now, here’s an interesting bunch. This is a party made up of independents. Might be worth a mention.
- Liberal Democrats - Very pro-Europe. Maybe a bit too much?
- No2EU: Yes To Democracy - You what? I can’t vote for a party that can’t spell! No idea what they are campaigning about
- Pro Democracy: Libertas.eu - Got a leaflet through the door from this lot. The BBC says they are well funded (so it must be true). They want to stop that silly moving the EU parliament round Europe every month. Got to consider them just because they have some common sense.
- Socialist Labour Party - Socialist Worker! Get your Socialist Worker! So many memories of Edinburgh in the early ’90s. They all looked like they didn’t have jobs. Says a lot for their policies
- The Green Party - Seemingly there is a green amalgamation in Europe of all the pro-green parties, either that or it is a huge algal bloom.
- The Labour Party - Are you kidding? If the UK lot are conning the tax payer with their expenses claim what do you think the European bunch are doing?
- United Kingdom First - Yes, first, but they probably think the UK stops at Newcastle.
- United Kingdom Independence Party - I know Kilroy has gone , but he’s not forgotten
- Independent - If he puts a leaflet through my door I’ll consider him. Yes, he is a him.
So, who am I going to vote for? I’ll narrow it down to those who have made the effort to contact me to tell me about their policies, with the exception of the BNP (who are a bunch of racist w*****s) then vote for whichever party is fielding the most women.
That last statement was a joke by the way. Women fought an died for my right to vote. People all over the world are still fighting and dying for their right to vote. The least I can do is do it properly.